Messages from the South

'Ol Nanny Zella Says:

Ya know Jim, I got's ta readin' this Sodomos Flog guy, and he's sayin' a lot hwat makin' sense ta me, y'hear? He's got me all wrapped up in this internet thingy thinkin' he's all right, but the more I think 'bout it, ya know I'm sayin' ta myself "why you are right, Sodomos Flog, you are!" And I'm tellin' Sue!

Young Capn' says:

Here in these 'nited states hwat 'Merica, ya got's yer major 'mendments. Ya got's yer first 'mendment hwat says ya got's ta have yer 'ligion, and yer second 'mendment hwat says ya got's ta have yer guns. And some hwat say ya gots ta have yer speech, but that 'dun matter much, 'cuz when them 'ol crazy Libs gets ta talkin' too much, why I just sick 'lil Bobby at im with a p-shooter, then hwat he all shut up. And that's why ya got's ta have yer guns.